


Say You Do

by khd14



Category: British Actor RPF, Real Person Fiction, Richard Armitage - Fandom
Genre: Angst, Arguing, Established Relationship, Explicit Language, F/M, Fighting, Fluff, Introvert, London, Long-Distance Relationship, Love, Miscarriage, New York City, North Carolina, Not Beta Read, Oral Sex, RPF, Romance, Sex Toys, Sexual Content, Strong Female Characters
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-08-12
Updated: 2018-02-03
Packaged: 2018-02-12 18:43:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 20,779
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2120649
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/khd14/pseuds/khd14
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><a href="http://s1064.photobucket.com/user/khdent/media/fa1f0be1-50f0-4b01-93d7-7c5d220c0f13_zpsaf63963c.jpg.html"></a>
  <img/></p><p>What happens when two of the most shy, introverted individuals meet and have a connection so strong they can't put it into words? Will their sudden mutual attraction threaten either one of their solid, professional careers?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Please excuse any grammar or spelling mistakes! Any questions/comments/concerns, please don't be afraid to voice them and let me know! Enjoy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FYI: Mentions miscarriage. 

**ONE**

_steal my t-shirt, wreck my bed_

 

Richard squirmed under her penetrating emerald stare, shuffling his weight between his feet nervously. His blue eyes were wide and darted between her face and the empty wine glass in her hand.

“Sloane, please, just listen to me,” He pleaded with her willingly, his British accent steady and smooth over the anger hanging in the air. His hands gripped the back of the dining room chair tightly, leaning on it not only for support but for a sturdy barrier between him and the very angry redhead.

She rolled her eyes, a scoff falling hastily from her lips. “Who the fuck do you think you are, Richard?"

The wine glass flew at his head so quickly he barely had enough time to drop his right shoulder, narrowly escaping the shards of glass as it collided onto the wall with a heavy thud.

“Sloane, just calm down,” He held his hands up defensively and attempted to walk towards her. _If he could just get his hands on her, calm her down, get her to relax..._

“Calm down? CALM DOWN?!” She repeated, grabbing the second empty wine glass from the kitchen countertop in front of her. _Furious wasn't even the word to describe her anger._

"I was just trying to help, Sloane, do something nice for you." He stopped in front of the kitchen island and dropped his hands to the edge of the marble countertop, gripping it tightly.

_God, he knew redheads had a temper, but this…_

“I don’t need to be fucking rescued, I don’t need to be taken care of; why can’t you understand that?” She took the second glass in her hand. "I love you, Armitage, but you HAVE to stop coddling me."

Richard maintained her piercing stare. “I know you don’t need me to take care of you, I didn’t mean it like that, I just... Sometimes I just feel the need to protect you."

"Protect me?" She repeated, her hand raising and taking aim once again at the dining room wall behind him.

“Sloane, DON’T.” His voice boomed through the small cottage, and immediately, he knew made a mistake.

She raised her eyebrows; her eyes began to narrow behind the thick, black framed glasses adorning her face. “What did you say?”

He sighed heavily, dropping his hands to his side. _Shit._ “You’re going to cut yourself on all this glass, now please, put it down,” His voice lowered, attempting to soothe the tension in her heart and mind.

She raised her left hand and threw the glass against the dining room wall. “Don’t tell me what to fucking do!”

He ducked, once again narrowly escaping the broken pieces of glass bouncing off the wall and floor. “You have to calm down, Sloane. Let’s talk about this, alright?” He walked around the bar, laying his hand on the marble countertop and made his way towards her carefully.

“I have to calm down? So you’re still trying to tell me what to do?” She pressed her hands against his chest and pushed him away from her, attempting to rid him from her bubble.

Richard took a hold of her wrist, his large hand wrapping around her forearm tightly. “I’m merely offering a better suggestion,” His sharp tone began to waver, his patience wearing thin.

“Don’t fucking touch me,” She snatched her wrist out of his hand and stepped back from his towering stature. 

He slammed his fist down on the countertop, furrowing his brows tightly. “Enough!”

She raised her eyebrows, startled by his sudden outburst and brought her hand across his cheek swiftly, the skin on skin slap echoing off the kitchen walls and cupboards. “You don’t get to tell me when it’s enough,”

In one smooth motion, he wrapped his hands around her neck and pulled her to him, his lips crashing hungrily onto hers. She pushed her tongue past his lips and entwined it with his, her hands grabbing the front of his t-shirt tightly.

“Take it off,” She demanded, narrowing her eyes.

His fingers found the hem of his shirt and quickly pulled it over his head, his arms wrapping her up once again. His lips trailed from her jawline and settled on her neck, his nips sending chills through her torso and down her spine. As she let her hands fall across his chest and down to his waist, he kissed her again; her fingers fumbling with his belt.

“Need some help, love,” He whispered softly, his lips curling into a smile.

She raised her eyebrows and pulled the leather belt from his jeans. “Don’t taunt me.” She kept the belt in her right hand and turned from him, walking from the kitchen.

“Sloane,” He warned, his voice tight with frustration.

She turned sharply, settling her eyes into his sparkling gaze, yet his jaw was still set tight. She knew he was growing more impatient by the second, but he knew he was on thin ice. His eyes grew wide as she pulled the tight tank dress from her body and threw it behind her, ignoring his pleading moans. His gaze settled on her apple shaped hips, enjoying the way it bounced and rippled with each step she took. Realizing the front of his jeans growing tighter by the second, he pulled them off in a hurry and followed her, not being able to take much more of her naked body without his hands all over it.

“Did I say that you could follow me?” She turned and took the other end of the belt in her left hand, letting the leather fall through her fingertips smoothly.

His eyes grew heavy with desire as held the belt tightly in her hands; his chest heaved with each breath he took, anticipating her next move; his hand rested on the back of his neck, gripping it tightly. _He needed her._ Sloane walked over to him slowly, her red curls bouncing over her breasts. She hooked her index finger in the front of his black Armani boxer briefs and pulled him towards her. He leaned down and pressed his lips to hers, his left hand gripping her ass tightly and a low growl rolled off his lips. His right hand dropped from her neck and down her chest, taking her full breast in his hand and squeezing it tightly. She moaned softly as he rolled her nipple between his thumb and forefinger.

Letting her hand fall between his skin and microfiber underwear, she slid her fingertips towards his cock and gripped it tightly. She fell to her knees, her hands trailing his taut thighs, which she sank her teeth into swiftly. He let out a groan as her tongue flicked the bite.

“Fuck,”

She chuckled and looked up at him, his dark hair shorter than normal, which meant she wouldn't be able to run her fingers through it, but at least she could still grip the strands tightly when she felt the need. She licked her lips and pulled his underwear down his legs; she might still be angry with him, but that man stirred something deep inside her soul - something she couldn't ignore.

He caught her gaze and smiled at her, his heart full of desire for her and her alone. She took his cock in her hands and guided it to her lips, taking him into her mouth slowly, her velvet tongue swirling around his sensitive head, a deep groan ensuing from his chest. In one quick moment, she took him entirely, his head hitting the back of her throat. He dug his hands into her hair, twirling the curls around his fingers and pulling the strands away from her face so he could rest his eyes on hers. She continued sucking and licking his throbbing cock, one hand coddling his balls and the other gripping his thigh tightly, his moans growing heavier each time she took him to the back of her throat. She let go of him quickly.

“Lay down.”

He dropped to his knees, taking her head in his hands and kissing her deeply. She pushed him onto his back, crawling over his 6’2” frame, leaving kisses and nips over his chest and neck. He brought his left hand to her thigh, attempting to push her onto his cock. She raised her eyebrows and ripped his hand from her leg, pinning it to the hardwood firmly.

“I don’t think so,”

He groaned heavily as her lips reached the sensitive fold of his neck and the tip of her tongue caressed the supple skin lightly. She wriggled her hips over his cock in a teasing motion.

“Sloane, I need you,” He begged, his right hand coming to her thigh. Once again, she ripped his limb from her leg and pinned it above his head.

 “Then tell me what you need,” She smirked.

He hesitated, and she brought her right hand from his forearm, slapping his cheek tightly. “Do you need me, Richard?”

He nodded helplessly, his eyes boring into hers. “Yes, yes, I do,”

“Do you need me to fuck you, Richard,”

“Oh God, please, Sloane,” He panted, his brows furrowing in frustration.

She smirked again, straddling his torso, and positioned her hips where his tip pressed against her folds gently. Slowly, she sank onto him, a moan rolling off her lips as he filled her completely. She rocked her hips back and forth, side to side, enjoying the way he always seemed to fit her perfectly. Her hands fell to his chest, her fingertips trailing through his dark hair.

“Can I touch you,” He pleaded, a groan rising from his chest as her hips .

She nodded, her head tilting onto her shoulder. “Yes,” She moaned, her hand moving down his chest, happy trail and up to her clit.

His hands gripped her hips tightly and he bent his knees slightly, allowing him to thrust deeper and harder than before. Her fingers circled the sensitive bud slowly, aching for release.

“Fuck,” She moaned, grabbing her left breast, her fingers beginning to work tirelessly over her nipples and clit. "I'm so close, harder,"

His thrusts grew quicker, hitting her spot just right, until her release burst onto his cock. She let her hand fall from her breast and onto his waist as she came, her walls tightening around his cock, urging him to come with her. He spilled into her moments later, his hands remaining tight on her hips. Finally, after her spasms grew farther apart, she collapsed on his chest. He held her tightly and glanced down at her, brushing a piece of her hair from her eyes. He placed a soft kiss on her forehead and she snuggled her head into his neck.

“And to think you didn’t even have to use the belt,” He chuckled.

She scoffed, looking up at him with a sly smile on her lips. “The night’s not over yet, love.”

*****

Before he even opened his eyes, Richard knew that Sloane was already up and out of bed for the morning. He let his left arm fall to the cold bedsheets beside him and he chuckled as his fingertips lingered on the edge of the mattress. He knew he should’ve mentioned the possibility of purchasing a bigger bed before spouting off ideas of purchasing a bigger home.

The bubbly voice floated upstairs and caught his attention, lifting his head from the pillow. _Kate_ , He sighed heavily, knowing the possibility of finding Sloane downstairs in the kitchen naked was now never going to be an option. He closed his eyes and laid his head back down into the mountain of pillows, enjoying the fresh lavender scent that Sloane seemed to always carry with her.

A low grumbling filled his stomach, _breakfast._ He hated to interrupt the time spent between Kate and Sloane, but if he was going to exert any amount of energy today, he first needed sustenance. Thankfully, a few minutes later, he heard Kate tell Sloane goodbye and the front door shut soundly behind her. The close relationship that those two had worried him at times, especially after the events that plagued them after the last few months. Sloane’s emotional health was always on his mind, and he worried that if she continued to hold everything inside, it would only make things worse on her.

Slowly, he stretched onto his back as he heard her light footsteps ascending on the stairs. Once she made her way to the master suite, she crawled over him on the bed carefully, her lips landing on his for a soft kiss. “Good morning, love.”

A simply sweet smile cascaded onto his lips. “God I’ve missed those words.”

“And I’ve missed you.” She collapsed onto him, laying her head on his chest. “I was thinking breakfast at Nicks?”

He chuckled, wrapping his arms around her tightly. “I had a feeling you were going to say that.” He hesitated at speaking the words on his tongue, but overall, bravery won out. “So Kate came over this morning?”

Sloane let her eyelids fall shut and let out a soft sigh. “She did,”

“Was that her idea or yours?”

“Hers. She stopped by on her way to work, wanted to know if I needed anything before we left.”

Richard let his fingertips fall to her waist, dipping them slowly into her dimpled lower back. “Ah,” He enjoyed the touch of her smooth skin against the pads of his fingers, the circular motion bringing a heavy sigh to her lips. “Do you need anything before we leave?”

“No. My mother and Vanessa took care of all that for me. I’m surprised you didn’t see the mounds of packages in my office; it’s been quite distracting.”

He chuckled. “Oh, I did. Now you just have to actually pack. You do realize that we leave tomorrow, right?”

She looked up at him and smiled. “And you’re aware of the fact that I’m a procrastinator, correct?”

“I’m terribly aware, Sloane.” His stomach grumbled again, this time more prominent than the last.

“I’m guessing I need to feed you if I expect you to exert any more energy today, hmm?”

*****

“We need to discuss this, Sloane.” Richard leaned back into the booth at Nick’s Diner and focused intently on the redhead in front of him.

Letting a sigh fall from her lips, Sloane dropped her dramatically. “You’re serious about this, aren’t you?”

He nodded his head intently. “I am.” He dropped his hands to the retro painted tabletop, splaying his palms across the cool laminate.

“And why is that? I’d just like to know your reasoning behind making this decision without me.” She crossed her arms across her chest, and immediately, he knew he wasn’t getting off on the right foot.

“Sloane,” He sighed heavily and took a sip of coffee, attempting to control his emotions before her. “I want to be with you, and I want to have a life with you. There’s no guest rooms; hardly any closet space, so I live out of my luggage every time I’m here; and what if my family or friends want to come visit? I know you love that house, as do I, but I think it’s time for a little more space, don’t you agree?”

“But,” She furrowed her brows tightly. “You live in New York, why do you want to buy a house here?” She didn’t want to admit that the reason was her, because honestly, no one had ever chosen to be with her in such a way. The life he lived was dramatically different than hers, and at times, she still struggled over the fact that he actually wanted to be with her. Even after everything they had been through together, he still didn’t understand how she struggled with his love for her.

“Because you are here and I want to be with you, that’s why.” He knew that pleading with her was not going to be the answer, as that would only push her away. Honesty, though… she thrived on honesty.

“Alright,” She dropped her hands to the table, picking up the cup of coffee in front of her. “But don’t you think we need to look at something a little… smaller?” She wanted to please him, to make him happy. And if it were to be an act so large that it made her second guess all the other decisions that she has made… then so be it.

Richard furrowed his eyebrows tightly. “Smaller?” He wasn't aware that she knew everything there was about that house - how many bedrooms it had; how large the kitchen pantry was; the glass knobs on the upstairs bedroom doors.

“Yes, Richard, smaller. That house is huge, there’s five bedrooms and two living rooms. It’s insane. So why can’t we find something in between my house and the house you looked at?” As hard as she tried to fight it, she slowly began to ease into the idea that maybe this would be worth it in the end.

The corners of his lips began to curl into a devious smile. “And how do you know how many bedrooms it has?” He just knew that she was getting on his level now.

“I’ve been in it.” She had hoped that her curt tone would bring an end to this conversation about how she had already toured this house multiple times - without his knowledge, of course.

“You’ve been in it,” He repeated slowly, his eyes narrowing.

Sloane nodded her head, the grief in her stomach began to rise to her chest. “A few months ago, my father took me to see it; while you were filming in England…” She cleared her throat, attempting to push the emotional knot from her body.

Suddenly, his bravery had escaped him, and instinctively, he glanced down at the coffee cup still wrapped in his hands. “Ah, yes.” He smiled at her supportively, not wanting to bring up the tragic accident that she experienced alone while he was away, filming in another country. “We would have needed a bigger home back then,”

_Back then_? She rolled her eyes. It was only a month and a half ago. “Yes, well, babies do require room to grow and play, Richard.”

Richard cut his eyes away from her quickly, the guilt of not being there for her when she needed him the most was still a heartbreaking memory to recall. The calls came frantically; _Richard, I don’t feel well;_ to _Richard, something’s wrong_ ; to _Richard, they’re taking me to the hospital;_ and then finally, _I’ve lost the baby._ He had never felt so helpless in his 42 years of life until he had to wait by the phone while the woman he loved miscarried their child 3800 miles away.

He shook his head from side to side slowly, attempting to casually veer from the subject they desperately tried to avoid. “So, something smaller, then? Shall we stop by Liam’s office after we eat, see if he has anything worth looking at?”

“If that’s what you’d like to do.” Her voice was low as she dropped her gaze to her hands, something he had rarely seen from this headstrong, confident woman across from him.

“You know that I don’t blame you, right?” His heart sank into his chest as he began to try and make her feel less guilty, even though he knew he was fighting a losing battle. She was always going to keep that guilt with her at all times, despite what anyone, including the doctors, had to say. “This was not your fault, you didn’t do anything to cause this.”

Sloane smiled at him softly. “I know, Richard.” He was trying. So hard.

The waiter set down their plates of fresh breakfast food in front of them, the strong, delicious aroma making their mouths water with anticipation. She picked up her fork, anxious to begin her last breakfast meal at Nick’s for quite some time.

“Sloane,” He pleaded with her, his eyes growing softer as each second passed. “Please.”

She sat her fork down on her plate and sighed heavily. “I know that you don’t blame me. I’m aware, alright? I just,” She shook her head slowly, silently praying for the tears to _just go away_. “I’m tired of talking about it right now.”

“Alright,” He took a sip of coffee and nodded towards her plate. “This is your last breakfast here for quite awhile, Miss Weismann. I suggest you start eating before it gets too cold,”

*****


	2. Chapter 2

**TWO**

_mess me up, get in my head_

Leaning up against the door frame of the walk in closet, Richard crossed his arms across his chest tightly and let his gaze rest on Sloane, sitting quietly in the middle of the floor. “Do you need any help?” He knew that she was going to decline his offer, but felt as if he needed all the bonus brownie points he could get his hand on.

“Do I look like I need help?” She continued transferring her clothes from folded up piles into the luggage around her. _Honestly, did she look like she needed his help?_ The neatly stacked piles of clothes surrounded her on all sides, each one having different outfits for the season as well as daytime vs. nighttime.

_Trust her, she has this under control._ He shook his head slowly and smirked. “You look like you have it all under control.”

“Don’t I always?” She raised her eyebrows and caught his gaze, challenging him silently.

_God that sass._ He chuckled. “Yes, that you do.” He continued watching her intently, spreading out her clothes into the suitcases in a logical pattern. He never gave her enough credit for having everything completely under control, even when the situation proved to be different. He pulled the tufted ottoman from the corner of the bedroom into the opening of the closet and sat down, a sigh escaping his lips. “Are you still upset with me?”

Sloane cut her eyes towards him and raised an eyebrow. _Did he really just..._

“Yes, you’re still upset.” He clasped his hands together and twiddled his thumbs, slowly gathering the courage to speak once again. “I know I should’ve went about this in a whole different way, but I was just excited, and I thought you would be too.”

Sloane leaned back onto her heels and rolled her eyes. “Don’t play the sympathy card with me, Armitage.” She pointed her index finger at him firmly. “I was excited. But something happened, and as a result, I’m not anymore. So stop pushing.” _She really didn't want to get into this right now._

Anxiety began to overtake his senses as he brought up the next subject. He was never good for explaining things how he saw in his mind but felt as if there were questions that still needed to be answered, even if that meant bringing up a subject that neither of them wanted to discuss. “But what if you were still… would you still be excited?”

Sloane closed her eyes and took a deep breath, realizing that this is the conversation he wanted to have and wasn't going to rest until he had it. “Are you seriously asking me that fucking question? If I was still pregnant, would I still be excited? What do you think that answer is, hmm?” She felt the tears slowly begin to form in her eyes as the thoughts she tried so desperately to hide slowly begin to make their way to the surface. “Kate and I were only a week apart, Richard. I have to see my best friend, my sister-in-law, pregnant while I’m not anymore, so don’t try and remind me of that, trust me, I’m fully aware.”

Richards heart dropped as he watched her wipe the tears from the corners of her eyes. _He hated to see her cry._ “No, I didn’t mean it like that, I mean… if you were still carrying my child, would you have been excited for the house?”

In that moment, she knew what he needed to hear and why he needed to hear it, and she wasn't going to deny him that. As much as she tried to be the strong one, the sensible one, the confident one… he was the one who carried all of this inside with regret. "Richard, it was a perfect idea, love. You were trying to take care of your family the only way you knew how." She knew how hard he was trying, from so far away, to make this situation right. "So yes, I would have been excited. I loved that house, Richard, and I would have bought it and surprised you with it if everything had went the way it was supposed to.”

He laughed. “See? You can’t get mad at me for trying to surprise YOU with it when you would have done the same for me.” That innocent smile appeared on his lips and she knew there was no way she could still be upset with him. _For the moment._

The smirk slowly appeared on her lips, competing with her sparkling eyes. “But its different." _And it was._

He smiled widely at her. “I may not understand you, or how you think… but I will love you and support you and cherish you... until you tell me not to."

She nodded her head, understanding that it was his equivalent of 'there's no one else I'd rather be with and I need you to be my person'. “If we’re going to my parents for dinner tonight, you’re going to have to help me with all this.” She glanced around at all the piles on the floor and sighed heavily, rolling her eyes. “Even though I really don’t want you to.”

“You don't like my help, I'm aware. I don't do everything to your particular specifications, but I promise I'll do my best." He winked at her and stood from the ottoman, moving it back into its place.

Sloane rolled her eyes. “How about you start with the packages in the office that my mother and sister bought for me... That should help.”

He chuckled. “Are you just trying to get out of dinner at your parents tonight?”

She smiled softly. “Packages. Office. Now.”

“You know,” Richard started, setting the packages on the bed in between the open luggage, “I used to think that I spoiled you more than your mother does.” He began taking out the maxi dresses, lightweight cardigans, and flowing sleeveless blouses from the bags and boxes. He shrugged at the excess of clothing and began folding them all; knowing Sloane, she wouldn't waste a chance to wear something new, cute, and comfortable. “I found this fantastic Burberry dress for you, by the way. I had it shipped to London, and I can’t wait to see you in it.”

The curiosity ate the best of him as he listened for her voiceful response, but the silence continued to be laid thick. “Sloane?” He walked into the closet and immediately froze, tilting his head sharply. “Where did you find that?”

She smirked, sensing his brief hesitation and growing pleasure. “It was in the very bottom of the closet, underneath a blanket.” She bit her bottom lip and dragged her fingertips across the leather riding crop, reminiscing of the many memories associated with the touch of the leather in her hands.

Richard’s breath hitched in his throat as he watched her, immediately growing hard at the thought. _It had been so long..._

“Do you think we should pack it?” She cut her eyes towards him quickly, snapping the crop onto the outside of the luggage in front of her.

“Yes,” He answered immediately and stuttered, “I mean, uh, if you want to.” He shifted his weight slowly between his feet, wary of her actions and unsure of what his next movements should be.

She shrugged her shoulders casually and smiled. “Why not, right?” She set it in the suitcase and glanced at him, her gaze traveling up and down his lengthy body quickly. “Excited about something, love?”

“Hmm?” He tore his gaze from the crop and latched onto hers, his hand gripping the back of his neck tightly. _Honestly, he couldn't tell you what she had said..._

Sloane chuckled and shook her head. “Nothing, love. Now let's get to packing. The quicker we finish…”

“On it!”

*****

The soothing lull of the tidal wave crashing onto the wet sand was a sound and feeling she never wanted to forget. Stretching her legs out in front of her, the sand gathered in between her toes and she made a conscious effort to remember how the tiny particles always seemed to gather in the most ticklish spots.

"I thought I might find you out here."

Sloane turned her head to the voice beside her and smiled up at Richard. The light breeze continued to embrace their bodies delicately, and instinctively, she shivered. Richard pulled the cardigan from his body and slipped it onto her shoulders, finally lowering himself to sit on the sand behind her.

Pulling her arms through the cardigan, she wrapped it around her body tightly, continuing her strict gaze out into the deep blue sea laid in front of her. _She was going to miss this place._

"Are you alright?" He pulled her close to him, needing to feel that secure bond the two of them shared like no other.

She leaned her back into his chest, molding into his frame. "I couldn't take it much more."

In the world of babies and pregnancies, Sloane was becoming obsolete. Her family had soon started to forget about their ordeal, making it seem as if she weren’t as important to her other blossoming siblings - was it because she wasn’t married? Was it because she didn’t need their help? Whatever the reason, it wasn’t a good feeling to be pushed out of her family because SHE didn’t have a family.

He wrapped his arms around her tightly, enjoying the close nature of her body pressed against his. "I know. Are you ready to go?" He looked at his watch, noting the time. "If we leave now we can get a few hours of rest before we had to the airport in Charlotte."

"Just a few more minutes." The tone of her voice was so low that he barely heard her over the rising tide. She closed her eyes and nestled her head into his chest, breathing in that deep lemon bergamot scent he always seemed to carry with him. No matter what the situation, she could somehow always be calmed by being held in this exact position with this exact man and she didn’t want to let the moment go just yet.

"You know we're coming back here, right?" He chuckled softly.

She lifted her head and looked up at him. "Are we?"

"That's your choice, love." He pressed his lips to her forehead gently. "It's always been an option, you know that."

"I know, I just," She shook her head, maintaining his gaze. "I just want to get away. I feel like my heart is pulling me in fifty different directions and I don't know which way to choose unless I experience them for myself. I feel like I need a change, something that’s going to help me develop into a better person; to experience the world in a way I never would have dreamed of.”

"Am I in one of those fifty different directions?" He leaned down and placed a kiss on her lips.

"Oh love." She chuckled. "You are in every single one."

"Good." He threaded his fingers through hers and pulled them to his lips, kissing them softly. “Then we’ll talk about it on the plane. I want you to experience the world, Sloane Weismann, no matter where and no matter what, you deserve to follow your dreams and see where they take you.”

She smiled at him. “Is that a promise?”

“That’s more than a promise, love. I’m just so proud of you right now, from the steps you’ve taken and the trials you’ve had to endure. You’re a lot stronger than you think you are, my love.” He stood up from behind her and pulled her to her feet, wrapping her up in one last hug. "Now, shall we get on with one of your fifty different directions?” He kissed her softly and smiled at her. “London awaits."

*****

Sliding down onto the wall in the hallway, Sloane let the darkness and silence surround her in an effort to feel more at peace with her mind. She stretched her legs out in front of her, the cool hardwood tingling the backs of her bare legs, and brought her Mac to her lap. Despite Richards protests, she had to finish up a few files and reply to client emails before she would be completely unavailable for a few days.

Before she met Richard, her job was her life. The life of a graphic designer was always chaotic, especially for those that owned their own business. She was lucky enough to be blessed with such a creative talent and a mind for business that she flourished in everything creative that she laid her hands on. She could understand the concept of your thoughts without having to speak any words; know exactly what look you were going for with a simple image; capture the right moment in time for those needing her superb photography skills.

She has a niche for the creative arts, which no one could take away from her. To say that she was a workaholic didn't even begin to describe the passion she had for her business. While she ate, dreamt, hell, even while exercising, she was coming up with new and creative advances to make her business more profitable and well known. Even now, with her life going the way it is, and her new adventure with Richard, her job is STILL her life - it just, at times, takes a back seat.

When Richard first met her, he was astounded at how she always remained so quiet and elusive, never once wanting to start a conversation but always wanted to remain next to him. He loved the fact that her honesty was so blunt and forthright, but always held back her own thoughts and emotions in fear of betrayal.

She was terrified, opening up to not only someone she didn't know but someone who wouldn't be around for long due to his filming schedule. Why take the chance? She hated to be around people, and that's how he lived - being in a crowd of people, surrounded by at least ten other individuals at all times. How could he live that way? And how could she be with someone who craved to be around others while she despised it? The simple task of going to the grocery store was daunting.

Yet it wasn't until the time they spent while stuck under an awning during part of a torrential downpour that she realized he was different. That's when they both realized that they were hiding themselves from each other because they were so used to being let down by the opposite sex that they didn't think it even made a difference.

It was there that they had their first kiss; a fire sparked in their eyes that lit themselves full of a passion so raw that they needed more immediately and couldn’t stop until they had more. Their hands roaming each other's bodies, discovering how good each other's skin felt on their fingertips; pressing themselves to each other in an effort to get even closer than they already were. That's where they realized, that in order to grow more as human beings that they want to become and not what society seems they should be, they needed to be honest with who they were and what they wanted out of life.

Shaking the memories from her mind, Sloane glanced at the clock and shut the laptop, slowly standing up from her place of solitude in the hallway. She began mentally making a checklist of everything she needed - and thought she’d forget - and began checking them off in her mind, from important travel documents to electronics to special plugs for said electronics, she needed to make sure she had them all packed before trying to wake up Richard.

She looked around her quaint little cottage and sighed, already missing the comforts of home and she hadn’t even left yet. This was the one of many steps that should would have to take in order to find out what she really needs and wants out of her life - and she was so thankful that Richard would be beside her, guiding her in his own little way and helping her when she falls. _The best is yet to come._

*****


	3. Chapter 3

**THREE**

**[flashback: first appearance]**

The bartender slowly made his way towards the tall, dark headed stranger sitting silently at the end of the bar, who was already on his second glass of whiskey for the night. His index finger lingered on the top of the heavy glass after he brought it from his lips and set it back on the oak countertop with a thud.

"Would you like another?" The young, blond bartender leaned up against the counter in front of him, glancing towards the empty glass.

A light sigh escaped his lips and his eyes grew heavy as the exhaustion slowly overtook his body; his back and knees ached with a dull pain he hadn't experienced in quite some time. It was at that point he knew that another glass of whiskey couldn't hurt.

"Please."

He hadn't planned on having this many drinks tonight and silently hoped that he could remember the way back to his temporary apartment unscathed, the whiskey slowly starting to take effect on his memory. Hell, what did he care, he could pass out here on this exact barstool and not realize the difference.

A few minutes later, the bartender sat down the old fashioned glass onto the black napkin, filled to the brim with top shelf liquor. His eyes grew wide at the sight, thinking to himself that maybe this wasn't such a good idea.

"Thanks."

The bartender furrowed his perfectly blond eyebrows tightly, not quite being able to tell where the stranger was actually from. "You're not from around here."

He shook his head slowly, the corner of his mouth turning into a smirk. "You're right, I'm not." Small talk - he hated it. Why couldn't people seem to get the grasp of not speaking - he didn't want to be rude, but for one bloody second he just wanted to be left alone.

"Do you mind if I ask what brings you here tonight?"

He chuckled sarcastically, the words “whiskey" on the tip of his tongue. "Work."

The bartender nodded, understanding that the man wanted to be left alone, which he completely understood. It was part of his job, whether it was joining someone for a deep conversation or making himself invisible; he was used to the moody, brooding males that paraded into his bar wanting to get away from the world.

After such a long day of filming, or shall he admit, lack of filming, all he wanted was to be left alone with a cool glass of strong whiskey. A good book would have been nice as well, but he knew that he wouldn't have been able to accomplish anything other than losing his place.

"What can I get for you tonight?"

He heard the bartender speaking to another patron at the bar and didn't have the energy or patience to care, until he heard the soft spoken, southern accent drawl from his right.

"A whiskey, please."

He lifted his head slowly, his gaze settling on the bar opposite from him, where the tall redhead captivated his attention immediately. She made her way towards the tables in front of the bar and took the leather messenger bag from her torso, laying it on the four person table gently.

The bartender smiled at her, making the drink and setting it back on the bar. "Working late tonight?"

"Yes, I'll be meeting with a client in a few minutes; I'm afraid it might last longer than usual." She took the glass in her hands and began to make her way back to her table.

"Then I'll keep your tab open, if you want something to eat let me know and I'll run it back to the kitchen." He shrugged his shoulders and pointed back behind him, smiling at her once again.

The stranger was amused at the scene in front of him - the bartender smiling cheerfully at the redheaded female; all the while she remained cold and emotionless. He enjoyed observing how other people chose to live their life - some wildly, some quietly - and quite frankly, was enjoying the sass of this gorgeous woman.

She nodded to the bartender softly, acknowledging his politeness, and backed away from the bar. She finally settled into the table, where she took a laptop from the bag beside her and opened it with a guarded eye.

He brought his gaze back to the glass in front of him, the round ice cubes slowly melting with each passing minute. He thought about heading back to his bed while he still had the ability to do so willingly, but truthfully, he wasn't quite ready to leave.

Normally, people didn't evoke a sense of entertainment for him, but tonight was different. He always enjoyed watching people with a natural distaste for others, female or not, and in some ironic, terrible way, he was pleased knowing he wasn't the only moody bastard on this planet tonight.

He noticed the large ornate mirror hanging up on the brick wall behind the bar and caught her stare in the reflection, and unlike 99% of the people he's come across in the south, she didn't smile at him or ask how he was. It was nice, having someone respect your privacy as well as decline any conversation or interaction.

Her lips remained pursed and her eyes bore into his, the moody ensemble making him temporarily unable to tear his eyes from her. With one final, heavy blink, she brought her dark green eyes back to the screen of the laptop in front of her, which was the last time he stealthily maintained her gaze that night.

The urge to get up and speak to her was never on his mind, and in all honesty, it was the last thing he wanted to do. But the way she captivated his attention completely was astonishing to him; he knew nothing about her, not even her name, but knew that there was something special about her, whether he wanted to admit it or not.

Staying on that barstool for as long as he could, he remained intent on the empty glass in front of him, his hands wrapped around it loosely. He attempted to steal another look at the redhead while settling his tab, but the company she held seemed to be taking the majority of her time. He knew it was a business meeting from the lack of food and stiff drinks, both parties immediately drawn to the folders and computers in front of them; a heated conversation pursuing.

Stuffing the wallet back into the pocket of his leather jacket, he tried to listen to their discussion, not exactly sure why he would want to do such a thing, but the whiskey had such a hold on him and for some unknown reason, he needed to make sure that she was okay.

Standing up from the barstool he had occupied almost all night, the fog invaded his mind, quicker than before. He asked the bartender for a glass of sparkling water in an attempt to rid himself of this anxious, dizzy feeling his heart and mind had rushed him into.

Holding up a finger to the bartender, his voice proved to be louder than he expected, even after rehearsing it in his mind. "Could I bother you for a sparkling water?"

Making his way toward the tall stranger, the bartender nodded his head. "Absolutely. Is San Pellegrino okay? It's the only one we keep in stock."

He chuckled. "That's fine, I just need something with a little less alcoholic content.” He turned his attention back to the mirror and watched - relieved, almost - at the sight of the unenthused guest leaving the redheads table. Why he felt so reassured, he had no idea, and even at this moment, still didn't feel the need to speak with her.

Rubbing her face with both hands tirelessly, she let out an exhausted sigh and turned towards the bartender. “I’d like another, please.”

The bartender smiled at her. “You’re not driving are you?”

She rolled her eyes into the back of her head, the question not only annoying but the content making her almost frustratingly livid. “I live two blocks away, Greg. Don’t ask stupid questions.”

She was by far the sassiest human being he’d ever come in contact with, and it completely enthralled him. He continued drinking from the small green bottle, relieved that the liquid elixir had began to rehydrate his body to a point where his mind and body weren't so foggy and loose.

The bartender continued to prepare her drink, stealing the occasional glances at her, as he did earlier in the night. It seemed to be a common occurrence for her, as she knew she had the eyes of the only other two patrons in the restaurant, but was never going to act on the attention.

Curling her legs underneath her in the sturdy wooden chair, she slid her elbows onto the tabletop and placed her head in her open hands, obviously fed up with the way the meeting had seemed to go.

He took another sip out of the small bottle and set it on the counter, the last of the cold fluid sliding down his throat. He laid some cash down on the bar and stood from his seat, catching the gaze from the bartender and giving him a slight nod, his way of saying “thanks for everything” without having to actually say it.

As he walked by her table, the faint scent of citrus - and was that lavender? - caught in his nose and he stopped momentarily, breathing in the fresh essence that for once made him feel at ease. Continuing on his steps towards the front door, he smiled at her supportively, as if to give her a small sense of encouragement.

Maybe she needed it, maybe she didn't. But he felt as if he had to do something.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Obligatory NSFW/smut warning.

**FOUR**

_say you might, for tonight_

Taking the phone in his hand and silencing the alarm quickly, Richard placed it back on the bedside table and turned to check on Sloane. Still sound asleep, he debated on how to wake her, as the last thing he wanted was for her to be cranky during their (very long) flight.

He gently pulled the covers from her and slid down to the end of the bed, taking her feet in his hands and pulling them apart. He watched as she stirred under his touch, allowing him to do as he wished while she remained blissful in her sleep.

Leaning down, he connected his lips with the skin where her ankle met her calf and slowly placed kisses and nips along the inside of her leg, only stopping to do the same to her other leg. He brought his hands to the insides of her thighs and pushed them apart, his fingertips gently cascading across the satin material of her underwear.

"Don't start something you don't intend to finish," She mumbled into the pillow, bringing her hand to his head where she patted it softly.

He took the waistband of her panties in his hands and pulled them down her legs, throwing them from the bed. "Turn over."

She sat up onto her elbows quickly, tilting her head slightly as she stared at him. He was leaned back onto his heels, naked, slowly stroking his cock in his hands. A burning desire pooled in her center as she watched him, his gaze never once lessening on her, his hand never leaving his cock.

She breathed deeply as he pointed at her with his free hand, his finger circling as he repeated himself, "Turn over."

Slowly, she turned onto her stomach, pulling a pillow underneath her abdomen. A chill ran down her spine as he positioned himself over her, his lips resting on the nape of her neck. "Good girl,"

A sharp retort came to mind, but she shut her mouth quickly as his hand fell to her thigh and then her center, his fingertips grazing the sensitive folds quickly. She moaned into the pillow as he inserted his middle finger into her and rolled her hips to his touch, aching for more of him.

"So eager," She brought her hands from underneath the pillows and gripped the wooden slats of her headboard tightly. Nudging her thighs with his knee, he positioned himself carefully above her and leaned down, biting her shoulder blade lightly. She moaned softly at the feel of his teeth against her sensitive skin and arched her back, needing more of him... Now.

"Just fuck me, Richard," A heavy, relieved gasp fell from her lips as he positioned himself at her center and slowly slid into her. "Oh fuck, just like that," She plunged her face back into the pillow and groaned, his cock hitting that sensitive bundle of nerves at just the right spot.

He chuckled, grabbing her shoulder tightly as he continued to thrust, driving into harder and faster at her request. He knew he wasn't going to last long, she was just so tight and so wet, and the pace she commanded had his toes beginning to curl.

"Sloane," He moaned, slowing his pace. "You're going to have to help me here, I'm not going to last long,"

She brought her hand from above her and dropped it, sliding it down her abdomen and to her swollen bud, aching for attention. She let her fingertips work her clit quickly, feeling the buildup as he began to quicken his pace once again. "Neither am I,"

Her release came right before his, her walls spasming against his cock, urging him to come with her. He leaned his chest onto her back and breathed deeply as his release overcame his entire body. "I think we're going to need a shower."

She chuckled, enjoying the way he felt as he laid on top of her. "That's not the only thing we need."

He pulled himself off of her. "Let me guess, food?"

"Yes, food." She rolled her eyes playfully at him as she sprang from the bed, grabbing his hands and pulling him towards her. "Come, Armitage. I'm not done with you yet."

*****

Grasping the magazine tightly in his hands, Richard glanced over at Sloane and smiled at her unknowingly. He continued to watch her as she curled up in the seat of their first class suite and continued to read the book shoved in her face, her fingers gripping the sides and spine carefully.

She cut her gaze to him curtly over the top of her glasses. "Yes?" _She hated to be interrupted while reading._

He slid the magazine onto the table beside him and leaned back into his seat, sighing delicately. "I was reading an article about what women want."

Sloane sat the book down in her lap and raised an eyebrow. "Is that so?" _Do men really read those stupid articles? As if it would tell them the secret answer to what women truly want? Newsflash: It’s not that simple._

He nodded his head slowly. "Tell me. What do you want?"

"What do I want?" She repeated, chuckling softly. "From what? Life? Us? The market? For dinner?"

Richard crossed one leg over the other and chuckled. "What is one thing that you want from me, that I'm not giving you? I mean, I know I’m giving you everything possible… so… keep that in mind.” He winked at her playfully.

She leaned her head back onto the seat and sighed, her mind beginning to turn. "Stability." She nodded her head curtly as she replied, pleased with her answer.

"Mmm, stability. It's a pesky thing, isn't it?" He cocked an eyebrow and smirked at her.

"Yes. It's terrible." She attempted to pick the book back up, anxious to pick up where she left off.

"Sloane," His voice sliced through the air quickly.

She raised her brows and dropped the book from her face. "I'm quite confident no one wants to hear a conversation about our relationship, Richard.”

He pulled his bottom lip between his teeth and bit the soft flesh tenderly. "Most women, I assume, would have said that they wanted something like, say, marriage..."

She blinked heavily, letting her eyelids rest for a moment before answering, and took in a deep breath. She was never good at these conversations, and never knew what to say and how to say it. "Because marriage is..." She scoffed and shook her head. "Why else do you think I answered stability?"

"Then move to New York with me." He crossed his arms across his chest tightly.

She rolled her eyes. "You're not serious."

"I'm very serious." He acted offended - him as the one offended? _Get a grip, Richard._

"I don't understand you. You want to buy a house in Wilmington, but then ask me to move to New York with you. Do you even know what you want?” She drummed her fingertips against the hardcover of the book in her lap and shrugged her shoulders, the conversation growing uncomfortable.

Richard shook his head and brought his hand to his chin, gripping it tightly. She knew he was getting more frustrated by the second. "I want to buy a bigger house in Wilmington, love. How many times do I need to explain this? You love that city. Its where your family is, its special to you, and I'm not going to take that away from you."

"But what if I want you to take it away from me?" Her voice was low as she dropped her gaze, not wanting the emotional connection to throw her off balance.

He furrowed his brows. "What do you mean, Sloane?"

"Answer this honestly, Richard. Is it good for me in Wilmington?”

He brought his right elbow to the arm rest and set it there gently, resting his chin in his fingertips. "I see you so differently than how you see yourself, Sloane. I know that you're trying to figure your life out right now, but maybe it's not meant to be figured out. Maybe it's meant for you to just live and not settle down in one certain city." He sighed deeply as he looked over at her. "I didn't just ask you to come with me this summer for the hell of it, you know. It's because I want you there with me, living your life in a completely different country. Open your eyes, learn a new language and a new way of life. I have so much faith in you, Sloanie."

She smirked softly at the mention of her nickname. "Do you know why I didn't want to come with you this summer? Really?"

He shook his head slowly. Honestly, he didn’t know, and he figured it had something to do with being in a new city and away from her usual surroundings.

She hesitated at first, not yet wanting to admit that he meant more to her than anything possible. "Because for four months, I'm going to see you every single day. Wake up with you, eat with you, shower with you, go to bed with you. Do you know how hard it's going to be when you're going to leave and I'm going to be alone? Without you there?"

His heart dropped. Living a life with him was never going to be easy, but he honestly didn’t think about it that way. "I never give you enough credit, do I?"

She shook her head slowly.

He sighed. "I didn't think so." He smiled at her weakly. "There are times where I miss you so much, I completely break down, and would do anything possible to have you there with me. Comforting me, laughing with me, just... Being with me. I never wanted to get so deeply involved with you, you know that, but by the time I realized how deep I was, it was too late.”

"And now you're stuck with me."

He chuckled. "Now, I'm stuck with you, and I still don't know what to do with you."

"So many options..."

"I could marry you." He stated matter of factly, shrugging his shoulders at the idea. _Why not?_

She felt the breath escape from her lungs, the anxiety raising in her chest at the mention of the devilish word: marriage. She knew that he was serious, as his tone and demeanor were both calm and steady over the silence that surrounded them.

"That always seems to quiet you." He chuckled quietly and she knew that her silence had hurt him once again.

She let her gaze fall back to his. "I just don't know what I'm supposed to say."

"Normally someone would agree or decline; and your reaction is more... Declining."

Her heart fell, as the last thing she wanted him to think that she was declining him - _how could she ever do such a thing?_ "No, it's just," She shook her head, attempting to unscramble the words from her jumbled mind. "We always agreed that it wasn't needed,"

"I know we did. But I changed my mind, and as time went on, I knew it was what I wanted from you. Your father told me one time, a story, about your dream wedding..." He smiled at her.

She rolled her eyes. "I was a child, Richard. It's something all little girls dream about."

"Exactly." He dropped his hand to the armrest and pointed at her. "You once dreamed about it."

"I did." She twirled the red curl around her finger and looked out the window of the plane, the vast, never ending sky drawing her in for a deep breath. "It would have to be small," She admitted softly, not yet giving him the answer he needed - only, for him, it was the answer that he needed.

He nodded. "Small." He repeated, a small sparkle sprouting from the corner of his eye.

"Why the change?" She turned to him quickly, her brows furrowing tightly.

He hesitated, drawing his fingers into a tight fist and releasing them slowly. "When you told me that you were pregnant."

She turned back to the window, watching as the beauty of the white wisps of the clouds distracted her from the reality of the situation. "Ah, yes. And even now, you still feel that way?"

He smiled at her. "Even more so."


	5. Chapter 5

**FIVE**

_have a heart_

Thankfully, between the directions Richard had left for her and the apps on her phone, Sloane was able to make it to Indaba Yoga Studio without any hesitations or wrong turns. There was a moment where she couldn't quite figure out which direction the train was heading, but with a little ingenuity she was able to calculate - errr, guess - the correct course.

Richard had been so sweet to plan her London excursions to the finest detail, making sure she always had the correct directions and which train to take, as well as different historical sites that were close by. He was always thinking of her and her needs, no matter what the situation called for.

It was then that she had decided to try and grow in her own character - she didn’t want to be the unromantic, introverted woman who always took advantage of his big heart and clean intentions - he just wanted her to be happy. Sure, she wanted him to be happy as well, but honestly… she had no idea where to even start.

Even though it was past ten in the morning, she was surprised at the number of people at each stop, hurrying on to their destination, somewhere in London. She had to remember, even in New York City, the traffic - nor people - never slowed, whether it was 10:30 or 3:30 in the morning. It made her appreciate home even more, as after 11pm the only noises you heard were the crickets chirping and the occasional siren.

Stepping through the doorway of the yoga studio, she breathed a sigh of relief at the calming effect that it seemed to have on her body, mind, and soul. The peaceful colors, the soft voices, the calm energy. She could definitely get used to a place like this.

Sloane was early for her class, so she was able to chat with an instructor and was shown around the facility. The private showers and organic body products were a welcome sight - she was sure that no one would want to be around her after a yogasana session. Everyone was friendly (a little too friendly, if you asked her), tea was offered, chats were happening in every corner.

Thankfully, she was able to excuse herself from the bustle of traffic and friendliness and head into the studio, making sure to claim a spot in the back. The natural light radiated throughout the room, giving the area a calming, peaceful aura. Still keeping a pros and cons list in the back of her mind, she had to give the credit where it was due: Richard had definitely chose the right yoga studio for her to practice.

Rolling out her mat on the beautiful hardwood floor beneath her feet, she caught the eye of a brunette in the corner, their motions the same. She smiled at her softly and sat on the emerald green mat with a sigh, pulling up her waves in a messy bun on the top of her head.

She chuckled to herself about a comment that Richard had made to her earlier in the morning: _“Make some friends while you’re out there. It could be good for you.”_ She had honestly never thought about making friends, the only things her mind concentrated on was her work, herself, and Richard. Maybe she did need to find someone else with a like mind - but where was she going to do that at? Online? She rolled her eyes at that thought.

She began to stretch, slowly, starting with her neck and finally down to her toes. She ached to get started with the class, as this was her way of losing herself completely in her thoughts. The entire situation with Richard pushing for marriage had her conscious in a tizzy and she didn't know what to think or even do. She just wanted to get to the real reason on why he was pushing her so hard.

Their relationship always seemed to come easy, with both parties always agreeing that marriage was never truly needed. While she only saw it as a ceremony and piece of paper, he slowly began to see it as her taking his name and truly becoming one. He was determined to get her to see it the way he saw it, even with her hesitation, he knew that she was slowly making herself more aware and more prepared for their next joint step.

There was always a nagging feeling deep inside telling her that she needed to be more appreciative of his actions, and as Kate had once reassuringly reminded her, _'There were plenty of other women in the world that would just as eagerly tell him yes'_. Although she knew Richard did love her entirely, there were times when she knew that she could be a pain, a pest... and legitimately wanted to change her actions.

She wanted to make him feel as if she had no doubts about their love. But how do you even do that? For once, she couldn’t pick up a book to tell her the answer. She had to feel it, be it, think it.

It definitely wasn't going to be easy.

*****

While sitting at the tiny round table in the cafe, Sloane took a small sip of the hot lemon tea and sat the pink porcelain cup back down on the countertop. She still couldn’t believe that she was finally in London, and despite her previous thoughts, had started to fall in love with its old city charm. She began to dig through her messenger bag as her iphone began to buzz, and sighed in relief once she finally retrieved it.

Richard was able to convince her to go back to the flat and take a nap, as he "wasn't going to deal with her cranky arse all night". Between the lack of sleeping and the time difference, it was weighing on her harder than she thought was possible. Between trying to work and communicate with her family - which, unfortunately, had to be on Twitter, as that was the only social media she preferred to use - the toll of being away from her home and family was starting to wear her down emotionally.

She needed to vent, to complain. She knew she couldn’t with Richard, as that just wasn’t fair to him - he had way too much to be dealing with as it is. She had thought about calling Kate, but after Sloane’s ordeal, nothing was ever truly the same between the two.

“Hi,”

Sloane turned towards the voice beside her quickly - the same brunette from the yoga studio. “Hi,” _Oh God._ Her eyes grew wide at the thought of having to speak with someone - a stranger - whom she knew nothing about.

“I saw you at Indaba this morning,” She smiled widely. “It’s not too often I hear someone with an accent like ours around London.”

Sloane nodded slowly, the comfort of the girls accent making her feel a bit… at home. She quickly wondered if Richard felt like this when he was in New York or Wilmington - did he long to hear someone with the same accent as himself? “Yeah, I’m sure you don’t.” She glanced over at the empty chair across from her at the table. “Did you want to sit down, or…?”

“That would be great!” The brunette sat down quickly, placing her bag and yoga mat on the floor next to her. “I’m Jen.” She took a long sip of the green smoothie in her hands and smiled.

Nodding her head slowly, Sloane took a sip of tea and sat the cup back down. “Sloane.” She definitely wasn’t in the mood to chit chat, but she did offer for the girl to sit down… Albeit, it was polite, it was just… a bit much.

“So, Sloane, judging by your accent, I’m going to say… North Carolina?”

Sloane raised her brows and smiled softly. “You’re absolutely right.”

Jen shrugged her shoulders. “I’m from Virginia. Moved to England a few months ago after a job offer. I swear, I feel like my Southern accent has gotten worse since being so far from home…” She chuckled and looked around the empty coffee shop. “I’ve never seen you at Indaba before. Have you just moved here, or are you vacationing?”

“Uhh…” Sloane furrowed her brows. “Sort of vacationing, sort of working. A little of both, I guess. I’ll be here until September.” Her and Richard had never talked about _why_ she was there and _what_ she would say when asked that question. They’re both so private regarding their lives and each other, that they would never truly say, _“I’m here for my significant other.”_

“That’s awesome. How are you enjoying your time so far? How long have you been here?” Jen took another sip of her smoothie, seeming to have calmed down a bit.

Sloane nodded at her questions, obviously excited to be around someone with the same accent. “I just got here a few days ago, actually, so, so far yes. I can’t wait to discover more of this incredible city,”

“Well, I’d be more than happy to show you around if you’d like. Between work and my boyfriend, I have a few extra hours of free time, and trust me, there are plenty of non-touristy spots that I think you would love. I know I did at least.” The look on Sloane’s face must have made her nervous, as she quickly retorted, “I’m sorry, I’m being too much, aren’t I? Ugh, I do that sometimes. I just got excited, and,”

Sloane chuckled. “It’s fine, I’ve just been a little on edge with all this traveling.” She attempted to smile at Jen, hoping to relieve her of her nerves. “That’s so very kind of you, offering to show me around. I’d love to take you up on it, when you’re not so busy.”

Jen sighed in relief. “Oh, good! I know, I talk a lot, I apologize.” She took the remaining sip of her smoothie and slid the cup to the center of the table. “I work at Standard Chartered in International Banking, so my hours are kind of odd, but I like it that way.” She had a sense of pride about her that Sloane just couldn’t brush off. “I’ll give you my information. I have to get to a meeting now, but you can look me up on social media to prove I’m not some sort of serial killer.”

Sloane chuckled. “I will do that,” She watched as Jen took a business card from her bag and began scribbling on the back in a hurried fashion. Her nerves began to unwind as she realized the girl was just being kind and, well, Southern - something she missed greatly.

“It was great meeting you, Sloane. I hope to see you around, and if not, I completely understand.” Jen handed her the thick ivory business card with a smile Sloane just couldn’t help but to reciprocate.

“Yes, you too, Jen. It’s always a good idea to keep in good company with others that sound like you, isn’t it?” Sloane took the card and slid it into the pocket of her messenger bag.

“Oh,” Jen sighed and gave her a quick smile. “You have no idea!”

*****

“Remember that time in New Zealand,” Richard started, bringing the glass of red wine to his lips.

Sloane chuckled and furrowed her brows. “Which time?” She slid her legs up underneath her, letting her right hand fall to her knee carefully.

He chuckled. “The time when I needed you so desperately, that I made you take countless number of flights just to be with me for only a few days?”

She smiled softly, the dim light from the candles on the tabletop making her skin glow with excitement. “I believe I ended up travelling for four days straight. It seemed as if everything went wrong - you called me on a Saturday, begging to see me. I flew out on Sunday evening, missed my connecting flight in LA, finally got on a flight to Sydney, then the plane to Wellington was on a terrible delay… I was terrified that by the time I arrived, I would have missed you.”

_Stroking her mess of red waves, Richard continued to strum his fingertips from her hairline to the crown of her head, watching as she slept so peacefully in his arms. He wanted to remember every little detail about her that he had forgotten - from the way her full lips parted ever so slightly while sleeping; the way she unconsciously held onto him to keep him as close as possible; the lightning bolt shaped scar underneath her chin._

_Glancing over at the clock on the table, he knew there was no more time to be wasted, as he had to be out of the hotel and onto the set in less than hour. He was already cutting it too close._

_“_ _Sloane,” He kissed her earlobe as he whispered her name softly in an attempt to rouse her from her deep slumber._

_She pulled her head back and looked up at him, her eyelids fluttering open quickly. He knew that the next 20 minutes were going to be the most difficult that either one of them would have to endure._

_“It’s getting late,” He whispered, dropping his hand from her scalp. He cradled her head gently and placed a soft kiss on the tip of her nose._

_“Don’t leave me,” She whispered painfully, the tears already spilling onto her cheeks in a steady stream._

_“I don’t want to leave either,” His thumb caressed her bottom lip softly, his bright blue eyes beginning to fill with tears as well. “Trust me,” His lips pressed against hers desperately, in an attempt to remember this moment for as long as he possibly could._

_“But I need you,” She attempted to take a deep breath in order not to start sobbing. She didn’t want to do this to him, really, she didn’t._

_He smiled weakly. “I’m all yours, Sloane Weismann. Whether you like it or not.”_

“You were right on time.” Richard smiled at her and took another sip of wine. “That was when I knew, to me, that you’re irreplaceable.”

She smiled smugly. “Are you going to go all Beyonce on me now?”

He chuckled and cocked his right eyebrow. “Would you like me to? I believe there’s plenty of room out here,” He glanced around the empty outdoor deck, where the sights and sound of night time in London surrounded them on all areas.

“It would be an interesting turn to the night.” She took a sip of wine and brushed a curly lock from her face.

He was quiet for a few minutes, leaning back into his chair, balancing his chin on his index finger, never once taking his eyes off her. “The book.”

“Ah,” Sloane took another sip of wine, her eyes widening with excitement. “The book.”

_“Miss Weismann?” The flight stewardess tapped Sloane on the shoulder lightly, a soft smile approaching her lips. “This was left for you.”_

_Sloane furrowed her brows tightly and took the small package in her hands. “Thank you,”_

_The small 5x7 leather journal was worn in all the right places, and a small off-white card was held in place on top by a thick satin ribbon, covering all of the edges securely. Wiping the tears from her cheeks with yet another tissue, Sloane pulled the end of the ribbon and watched as the satin fell from the thick leather in one smooth motion._

_She knew it was Richard by the thick block lettering of her name and smiled at the sentiment - he always knew exactly what to do. Pulling the card from the envelope, a smile rose to her lips as she read intently._

_“Earlier that day - yes, that day, the one when I first laid my eyes on you - I was in a little shop down by the river, and they had these marvelous leather journals. I was led to buy one, why, I had no idea at the time, I just knew that it was important. I knew you were going to be a crucial part of my life from the moment I saw you, and I wanted to document our entire existence for us to reminisce about later on in life. This book is about love, and romance, and our thoughts and ideas. It’s about me loving you completely.”_

Drawing her from the memory, Richard’s tone grew softer with each word. “I’d like to keep it going, if you don’t mind.”

“Oh, love. I never asked you to stop.” Sloane smiled at him and set the glass of wine down onto the tabletop. “You always seem to know exactly what to do and how to do it.”

He smiled and reached into his backpack located snugly at his feet, pulling out yet another 5x7 leather journal. “Number three.” He slid it across the table, his fingertips drumming on the thick leather intently.

“Already?” She took the worn leather into her hands and thumbed through it. “And you’re sure you want me to read it?”

“Honestly, I think you need it right now.” He caught her gaze and held it for as long as she would allow. “I can’t even begin to fathom what you’ve went through and what was in your head. Truthfully I don’t think I can handle it, but, this is how I saw everything. And I need you to see it.”

The waiter slowly made his towards their table, inquiring about desert. Of course, Richard had to order chocolate ice cream and Sloane decided on the chocolate banana cake. He took the journal from her and placed it back in his bag, safe keeping for the night.

“So, I think I made a friend today.” Sloane was hesitant on bringing up the subject, as she knew he would be excited, but still leary. “She seems… excitable.”

“Excitable?” Richard chuckled. “We’re both quite anti-social, how did you end up with the excitable one?”

“We were in the same yoga class. She came up to me afterwards at the coffee shop, excited to hear someone with the same accent as herself.” She shrugged her shoulders casually. “She seems sweet. I've researched her, and thankfully, she doesn't show herself as a serial killer.”

He laughed. “That’s good to know. I’d hate to have to lose you, you know.” He replied, winking at her.

“Oh, I’m sure you could always find a replacement for me, Richard.”

He dropped his hand to his chest, covering his heart. “There is no one else like you, Sloane.”

“Well, sure, they wouldn't be as sassy, and probably wouldn't tell you no as much…” She rolled her eyes. “But as Kate one time so lovingly told me, _'There are plenty of other women in the world that would just as eagerly tell him yes'_.”

Richard froze. “Kate… told you… that?” He furrowed his brows tightly, a slight shade of pink beginning to appear on his cheeks.

“That’s completely,” He shook his head slowly.

Sloane chuckled. “Bullshit?”

“Exactly.” His gaze changed from watching her lovingly to caring over her protectively. “There might be plenty of women around me who would tell me yes, Sloane, but you are the only one I want.”

“I know, love. I didn't like it either.”

Leaning back in his chair, he crossed his arms across his chest. “Why are you telling me this? Normally you prefer to keep things inside, and quiet.”

She cocked her head to the side, slowly tilting it towards her shoulder. “I’m…” She trailed off, her eyes darting around the empty space. “Trying something new.”

“New?” Richard repeated, a smile growing on his lips. “Please, continue.”

“I've realized how much you do for me, and so I’m trying to be nicer.” She shrugged her shoulders nervously. “I just want you to feel like you believe me when I tell you that I love you.”

“Oh, Sloane.” Richard stood from his chair and sat beside of her on the plush white couch. Cradling her head in his hands gently, he placed a single kiss on her lips and smiled. “You don’t have to prove your love to me, sweetheart. I can feel it, wherever I go.”

“I just don’t want you to think that I take you for granted,”

He shook his head furiously. “You stop right there, Sloane Weismann.” He combed a lock of her hair from her face and tucked it behind her ear. “You have a certain way about you, yes, but never have I ever had the thought that you would take me or my love for granted. I know that you love me, and I know that you care for me, alright?” He traced his thumb across her bottom lip and kissed her. “Now,” He smiled. “Desert!”

As they were finishing up the remainder of the wine, Richard studied Sloane as she took the last few bites of the chocolate banana cake between them.

"You do realize that I'm going to be carrying John Proctor with me, wherever I go?"

She smiled at him and brought the spoon from her lips, scooping up the last bit of ice cream on the plate. "Yes, I'm aware. Like you did with Thorin,"

He chuckled. "Yes, like I did with Thorin, only a little more... angry."

"Well, I do enjoy it when you're angry..." She winked at him and took a sip of her wine, sighing after she set the glass down. "I know what you're saying, Richard. There's going to be times when you want to be left alone to dwell on your thoughts and be the moody bastard that you are, and that's fine. Because, frankly, I'm not going to want to be around you all the time, either." She smiled at him sweetly. "I've told you from the very beginning, I'm not a psychic, so if you want to be left alone, you just have to tell me. And trust me, I'll understand."

Leaning his forearms onto the edge of the table gently, he clasped his hands together. "I love you," He mouthed the words perfectly, his lips curling up ever so slightly.

She smiled. "I know," She replied silently, eyeing her empty wine glass. "Now. Are we going to spend all night here, or are you going to take me home, Armitage?"


	6. Chapter 6

**SIX**

**[flashback: first encounter]**

Rain. He imagined it had to stop sometime, right? In the past four days, Wilmington had been drenched with an unbearable amount of water. Inches lined the streets; flower beds were becoming small pools of stagnant water; gutters were overflowing furiously.

Of all the times to forget his umbrella, of course it was this morning. The morning where the raindrops pelted down with a vengeance, each one becoming more powerful and larger by the second. He was always so well prepared, yet today… today was just different.

After oversleeping, he was late to his first call, flubbed his lines, couldn't get into the character… He was also so professional, so well prepared, that the director decided that maybe they should just cut it early and let everyone get some much needed rest. Instead, he decided that he needed breakfast, at one o’clock in the afternoon. He was starving, craft services just wasn't cutting it, and for bloody sakes, he just wanted some eggs and toast.

The rain had finally let up, so he ventured from his apartment quickly, knowing that the break in weather wouldn't last too much longer. He was able to make it to the post office, where he stood underneath the awning in disbelief, watching as the bottom fell out of the sky.

As time went on, raindrops multiplied by the thousands, and the melody they were making as they hit the cement, asphalt, metal roofs of the cars, the thick cotton of the awnings… the melody turned into a beautiful little tune, somehow calming him for the time being.

He was so involved with the rain, that he didn't even realize the redhead exiting the post office behind him, slowly coming to a stop underneath the awning. She unfolded the clear umbrella and held it tightly in her hands, bringing it above her head. She looked around at the lack of people and sighed, a small smile occupying her lips.

This is what she enjoyed - the rain. The smell of it, the sound of it, the feel of it. She loved every minute of it, and never wanted it to end. Her bright green eyes sparkled as she glanced up at the sky, watching in delight as the clouds changed not only their form but their color; morphing into a dark heather gray and then to a charcoal color, with lightning beginning to crackle behind them.

He turned towards her, noticing the presence of another human being, yet not quite catching who it was - and not really caring, either, if he were to be honest. After the double-take, his heart began to beat faster at the sight of this glorious woman beside him, not even three feet apart from each other. And was that…? Yes, he could still smell the lavender as she moved about.

It made him want to smell every inch of her - her hair, her neck, her thighs. He shook his head at his thoughts, realizing, _‘No, Rich, that’s not creepy...’_

He wanted to speak to her while he had the chance - and let’s face it - it had been weeks since he last saw her, and when would their next chance be? He wasn't going to risk it to be never - he couldn't bear the thought, honestly. Why put it off when the realization was clear: they were both here, at this exact spot, on this exact day and time, for a reason. And he needed to know what that reason was.

He gathered his courage, slowly, and shifted his weight uncomfortably. “It’s raining.” He rolled his eyes as the words fell from his lips. _‘It’s raining? Really, Rich? That’s the first thing you’re going to say to her?’_

She turned towards him, a soft smile on her perfectly pink lips. “It’s beautiful, isn't it?”

It was at that moment in which he lost his breath completely. He searched her face for some kind of flaw, hoping to pull him away from her, pull him away from this hunger that ached in his bones. Even in the pouring rain, with her hair drenched, absolutely no makeup on her face… she was the most beautiful thing he had ever laid his eyes on.

He nodded his head slowly, his breath beginning to return, his heart still not slowing down. “Aye, it is.”

She pulled her gaze from him and glanced up at the sky, the dark grey clouds slowly surfacing and beginning to rumble. “There’s a storm coming. You might want to hurry to… wherever it is you’re going.”

“I forgot my umbrella, so, somewhere close, with breakfast, preferably.” He chuckled at his ill preparedness and glanced over at her, even if it was just one more time.

“Nick’s Diner is just right across the street, to your left. They have an amazing array of breakfast items, whatever you’re in the mood for.” She gripped her umbrella tightly and held it out to him. “Take it, you probably need it more than I do.”

He chuckled, holding up his hands in defense. _Take her umbrella from her? No, absolutely not..._ “No, I can’t,”

She shrugged her shoulders. “Please. I’m parked just right over there,” She pointed to the line of cars on the edge of Front Street and smiled. “I insist.”

He took the umbrella from her hesitantly, his hand hovering above hers. “I wouldn't feel right, leaving you stranded here without an umbrella in this dreadful weather.”

She rolled her eyes and dropped her hand from the handle, where it landed on her hip. “I’m a big girl, I believe I can take care of myself.”

_There’s that sass he was looking for…_

“Alright,” He smiled at her as he held the umbrella tightly in his hands. “If you insist.” She started to turn, heading towards her car, only he stopped her quickly. He didn’t want her to get away that quickly. “How can I return this to you?”

She turned and smiled. “I’m sure it will be returned to me when I need it.”

“So, then, you believe in fate?” He slid his free hand into the front pocket of his coat, tapping his fingers nervously against the satin lining.

“Absolutely. Fate follows the fearless, correct?” Her eyebrows raised excitedly, and he concentrated on the sparkle in her eye and the wide smile adorning her face.

“And how fearless are you?” He couldn’t help but to smile at her - the way she spoke, her accent, her facial features. He needed more of her, filling every empty hole with a happiness he hadn’t felt in… years.

“You’ll just have to find that one out for yourself.” With a deliciously evil smirk, she turned from him and headed towards her car.

It was a perfect, predestined moment where the rain began to let up, and as soon as she nestled herself into the drivers side of her BMW, the thunder roared and the rain quickened.

He looked up at the sky, as if for some sort of sign, and watched helplessly as she drove away. The last thing he wanted was to see her leave as quickly as she came, but at least he had this moment to remember her by.

*****

Richard leaned back into the corner of the soft suede couch, perching his feet against the glass coffee table in front of him. He continued staring at the umbrella, folded up and leaning against the doorframe of the front door.

Her image continued to infect his mind as the events this morning kept replaying themselves over and over and over. He wished he had said something different; he wished he would’ve asked for her number, her name. He didn’t want to push it, but he had this unexplainable urge coursing through his body.

This woman.

He sighed and leaned his head back against the couch. He knew nothing about this woman - how could she invoke this fire in his belly? This feeling of walking on air? This smile on his face? He wanted, no, needed, to know more about her. And he was determined to find out, no matter what it took.


	7. Chapter 7

**SEVEN**

_bend the truth_

A definitive peace of mind pulled on Sloane’s heart as she watched Richard come through the door at half past eleven in the evening; his skin reddened by the hot shower he always took after a performance and the droplets of sweat still clung to his brow from the excitement and burden of the stage door.

He remained silent as he slung his backpack onto the couch and sat down next to it, a deep sigh falling from his lips. Tonight’s performance seemed to have taken every bit of energy he had left, and for the first time, he silently wondered how his body would ever make it up before the next night. Exhausted wasn’t even the word he could use anymore, as it was such an immense feeling of emptiness that he honestly didn’t think that he could ever recover.

_This._

Enveloping the quiet; taking the time to recharge; not having to mutter a word to one another… these were the things that made their life not only make sense but work in a way that no one else could quite fathom. The basis for their relationship was not their undying love for one another, but the fact they understood each other without ever having to explain themselves.

Not many people understood their need for quiet, their separate alone time, their time to recharge, their time to meditate and just be at one with themselves. For some, it was unthinkable, as having a mind numbing, senseless conversation seemed to prove their undying love and utmost respect. And unnecessary words were just that… unnecessary.

As her gaze slowly began to fade from the words on the page, Sloane closed the book in her lap and rose from the window seat, ultimately deciding that sleep was the only cure for her dragging mind and body. Her day had consisted of running all over the city for certain errands, certain lunches, and certain markets… and not to mention the load of work that continued to pile around her.

While never being able to sleep more than two hours in the United States, she somehow found herself grudgingly waking from a 7 or 8 hour coma that always set her mind at ease. Maybe it was the air, maybe it was the atmosphere, maybe it was Richard… who knew, really, but all she wanted was for it to continue as long as humanly possible.

Richard reached for her hand as she strode by, ultimately pulling her to his lap. He pressed his lips to hers, a passionate kiss ensuing. He pulled away from her a few minutes later, his eyes sparkling relentlessly.

“I’ve missed those lips terribly,” He murmured against her neck as he nuzzled the sensitive skin in a desperate attempt to feel as close as possible to her.

“Hmm, well,” She chuckled, her warm embrace pulling him closer to her. “They’re right here and not going anywhere,”

He smiled at her, kissing her again. “I’ll remember that,”

“I imagine that you’re starved…” She raised an eyebrow suspiciously. “Would you like me to make you something to eat?”

He brushed a strand of her hair behind her ear. “No, love, I’m just going to grab something quick and then climb into bed.”

“Alright then,” She kissed him quickly and reached for her book beside him. “Just try not to wake me, hmm?”

*****

As Richard slid into the sheets behind Sloane, he reached for her, pulling her close against his bare body. “Sloane,” His voice was low and tender as he called for her, never wanting to actually wake her from her slumber, but in order for his mind to rest, he needed to release a few thoughts that his mind just couldn’t put down.

Sloane turned towards him and sighed, her eyes still shut tight from a desperate need for quiet. “Yes, love?” She rested a hand against his chest and tapped her fingertips in an effort to urge him to continue.

“Your father called me today,” He revealed, awaiting her response nervously. He knew that she wasn’t going to take to this situation kindly; her father and her partner conversing about her personal life, telling her what she should or shouldn’t do. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

She let her eyelids flutter open, slowly resting her gaze upon his pondering eyes. “I wasn’t going to talk about it until I knew what I had thought about it.”

“Well, it might help to talk it out… what do you think?”

She sighed heavily and sat up, resting her shoulder against the pillows and tufted headboard. “The city wants to buy my house. And because it’s been renovated, and is in the historical district, they’re offering a lot of money for it.”

“We’ve talked about selling before, love, so why the second thoughts?”

“It’s not second thoughts, Richard. It’s after thoughts. Sure, I want to sell it, and sure, I love the amount that they’re offering. But, where am I going to live? Where is all my stuff going to go?”

“With me, of course.” He demanded, his voice dripping with a pure sense of reality. “You’ll live with me. We’ll ship your things to New York, or here, which ever you prefer.” A single eyebrow rose on his forehead, testing her to rebut his offer for the second time.

As she focused on his sharp silhouette against the darkness, she knew that there was no way she could say no, but continued to fail to produce the words necessary. She sighed heavily as she continued to tally the facts against the pro and con list trapped in her brain, but finally gave up as the voices proved to be too much to handle at this time of night.

“Alright.” The single word fell from her lips, and in a moment all their own, they let the silence encompass them until ultimately, sleep prevailed.

*****

“So, tell me Sloane, how are you enjoying London?” Jen attempted to contain her excitement as she strolled through Hyde Park, glancing over at the tall redhead to her left.

Sloane smiled as she took a sip of coffee. “It’s, well, wonderful actually. I didn’t think that I’d fall in love with it so quickly.”

“It is easy to do. I remember when I first arrived, everything seemed so… odd. It was completely different than life in rural Virginia, of course, but… there was something that just felt like home, and I had never felt like that before. I still don’t always understand the accents, or the words, or the phrases,” She chuckled. “But it’s more forgiving than the US will ever be.”

“Honestly, almost anywhere is more forgiving than the US.” Sloane scoffed, turning towards the brunette. “And you said you’ve been here for… a few months?”

“Yes, well, more like… five months, 2 weeks, 3 days.” Jen began to blush and smiled nervously. “It’s a habit, well, banking habit I guess. I keep track of everything!”

Sloane chuckled. “If only I could do that. I have to write down everything or else I’m at risk of losing it all. Richard has to write down every single thing for me, and even then, I’ll still misplace it!” She shook her head slowly and smiled. “I hate having to rely on technology to remind me of appointments or grocery lists or directions. It’s maddening!”

“It is, isn’t it? I have to remind myself that people were able to survive fifty years ago without all this technology, so me relying on a handwritten note shouldn’t make me feel too old, but it does.” She sighed. “I know it can feel scary, being here alone, and of course, being a woman is hard enough…”

“Oh,” Sloane turned towards her quickly. “I’m… here with someone.” She managed a small smile and continued. “Richard is here until September for… work, and since I’m able to take my job with me wherever I go, he asked me to come with him. And, let’s face it, who’s really going to say no to that?”

“That’s great! What does he do, if you don’t mind me asking? It’s just that, it’s weird timetable, you know, a few months for a job.”

Sloane’s mind quickly tried to make up words to explain - as she definitely wasn’t going to reveal the real reason yet. “Uh, well, he’s in production. For theatre.” She shrugged her shoulders, as if trying to convince herself that it not only sounded real but was believable.

“Wow! That’s exciting. Theatre, hmm.” Jen furrowed her brows tightly. “This would be the city to do it in!”

“Yeah, and, he grew up in Leicester and went to school here in London, so it’s been nice having him around to tell me what I should and shouldn’t do. It’s just, his schedule is crazy, you know? So we don’t get that much time together.”

“Well, if you ever get bored, you can always call me. Or text, I know some days I usually prefer words over voices. You know, there’s a few touristy things I’ve always wanted to do, but never had much time or, well, courage to do it. Like the Tower of London, the Globe, the House of Parliament, and OH! The London Eye. I’ve always wanted to do that!”

“We should definitely make plans to do that,” Sloane’s words surprised even herself. She was never one for “making friends”, as people not only were always so eager to please, but were downright selfish. It was always about what they wanted, and how they were feeling; and when you took the time to spoke, your words were keenly ignored and replaced with thoughts of their own.

“Oh yay!” Jen chuckled. “I apologize, honestly, I’m not usually this much of a nerd, but… most everyone thinks its either lame or overplayed!”

“Well, truthfully, I’d much prefer to live the life of a lame, overplayed nerd than of a stiff peacock.” Sloane chuckled to herself, peacocks - always so… ostentatious.

“I have to say, Sloane, it feels great meeting someone who’s not so…” Jen faded off, chuckling softly. “Well, fake.”

Sloane let out a hearty laugh. “If there is anything that I am not… it’s fake.” She nibbled on her bottom lip nervously as she second guessed her decision to hide Richard. She didn’t exactly lie, as he was in theatre production… but…. regardless, she decided to have the conversation with him later, detailing what should or shouldn’t be said. And she could already guess that he would say, _“I don’t care, Sloane, tell them everything!”_ and she would follow up with, _“But what if they spill every little detail of our life?”_ and it would just keep going and going until one of them finally put their foot down.

And this time… she was hoping it would be Richard.


	8. Chapter 8

**EIGHT**

_even if you don't, couldn't you..._

“Eggs this morning, love?” Richard smiled warmly at Sloane as she trudged into the kitchen, her bare feet slapping against the cool wood floor. His voice, still low and raspy from his performance the night before, struggled to find their way from his lips.

Groaning, she scrunched her nose tightly against her face as she slid onto the kitchen counter. “Sure,”

Richard pulled a handful of eggs from the basket in the refrigerator, setting them inside the glass bowl by the stove. “Scrambled? Poached? Fried?” He inquired, slowly turning around, pointing the spatula at her intently. “Boiled? Or… would you prefer an omelet?”

She laughed. “So many options, and you know that I’m never good at making such decisions.”

“Oh, I’m fully aware.” He raised an eyebrow slowly, never letting his gaze falter.

“Scrambled!”

He chuckled, continuing to stare at her. He knew her like no other, and was only anticipating her to run through at least two other options…

“Hmm, no, poached. No! Fried, I haven’t had a decent fried egg since before we left.” She admitted, scrunching her nose against her face. “Yes, definitely fried.”

Finally believing her words, he simply smiled at her and turned around to the stove. “I’ll be late tonight, I have some errands to run after I get off the stage.”

 _Errands? At eleven o’clock at night?_ She didn’t want to ask questions, knowing that if it were something important or something she should know about, he would have told her… wouldn’t he? Otherwise, why worry about it?

“Alright. I guess I can just call my other boyfriend to take me out for dinner.” She winked at him as he turned around, shaking his head slowly.

“Good; I needed you off my hands for a little bit. You’re just so needy, you know.” He laughed soon after she did, her vivacious amusement always bringing a smile to his lips and a falter to his heart.

Opening the door of the oven, he took a plate in his hands and slid the egg on top of the piece of toast and bacon. “Now, do you need anything else before I go?”

“No, I don’t think so.” She reached for her plate, but tilted her head towards her shoulder as he pulled it away from her.

“Are you sure? You have something to keep you occupied throughout the day and evening?” He winked at her as he pulled it away from her grasp once again.

“Just my food, please.” She replied, her green eyes narrowing as she finally just dropped her hands to the countertop, wrapping her fingers around the edge.

He laughed, setting the plate down next to her. “Alright, alright. Have a good time today.” His lips met hers for a soulful, rejuvenating kiss. “And remember, please don’t hesitate to call me if you need me.”

*****

Richard pulled Sloane from the bed with a giddy excitement, grasping her hand firmly in his. "Come," He commanded, turning and smiling at her. "I have a surprise for you!"

Sloane groaned, despite hearing the word “surprise” and pushed the bangs from her eyes. She made a mental note to get them trimmed somewhere, but shrugged off the thought after she looked at the time - almost one in the morning - and knew she would never remember anything now.

"I finally found it in this little music shop in Notting Hill, and I had to get it out right away," He led her to the little room off the living area, where he kept all of his music and instruments.

There it was - a small and yet still glorious piano, sitting up against the wall, beckoning for her in every possible way. She turned and glanced at Richard, standing nervously to her right, and quickly regained her gaze back to the vintage upright.

Sliding down onto the bench, she adjusted her posture and lifted her wrists, lightly placing her fingertips against the ivory keys. She played a soft melody for a few moments, not wanting to disturb the other individuals in the building.

"Why did you do this?"

He pinched her chin with his thumb and index finger, gently pressing his lips to hers. "Because I love you, and I knew you'd enjoy it. I want you to feel comfortable here," He smiled at her before continuing. "Why are you crying?"

She scrunched her nose, exclaiming, "I don't know!" She chuckled, wiping the tears from her cheeks. "I just love it."

*****

On a nice, enjoyable late Saturday evening, they were both perhaps a bit too drunk, and a bit too honest at this point in time. There was no doubt that both Richard and Sloane were both extremely fond of wine, especially on this night, when they were going on their third bottle of red…

“Remember when we were in New Zealand, and you took me to the glowworm caves in Waitomo?”

“Of course, how could I forget? It was there that I proclaimed my undying love for you.”

“Yes, Richard, but why did you do it there?”

He couldn’t help but to smile. “I remember, we were floating in this little boat, and it was crammed full of people. Peter, Martin, Dean, everyone was there. We were sitting in the very back, and we were so exhausted. You had arrived early that morning, and it just seemed like everything was already going by so quickly. Everyone was looking up at these magnificent living creatures, capturing this beautiful glow of light, and I look over at you, and you’re looking right at me. You had these tears in your eyes, and you whispered, ‘I missed you,’; and my heart just broke. There was nothing more beautiful at that time than you, right in that moment, and that’s when I whispered, ‘And I love you, so much more’.”

“I…” Sloane trailed off, taking the last bit of wine in her glass. She wanted to say it, by God, she was certainly feeling it at this time… “I think we should do it.”

“Do it?” Richard cocked his head to the side. “Well, I’m never going to say no to that,”

She laughed, throwing her head back. “No, you idiot. I don’t mean sex, I mean marriage.”

He raised his eyebrows quickly. “Marriage? As in, you, Sloane Weissman, wishes to marry me, Richard Armitage?”

“I hope that’s not really how you’re going to ask me,” She pushed the unopened bottle of Pinot Noir towards Richard, which he promptly opened. _And there’s bottle number 3…_ “Standing right there in the kitchen, opening yet another bottle of wine.”

He chuckled. “Alright, no, that’s not exactly my style.” He poured more wine into her glass, as well as his, and smiled. “Please tell me… what brought this on?”

Sloane had this entire speech in her head, of what to say and exactly how she was going to say it; but instead it seemed as if her entire mind went blank and all that she had left was inside her heart.

“I want to be with you. Every day, every moment, every second. You do something to me, Armitage, and I never want to forget how it feels.”

His heart pounded inside of chest as she spoke the words; tears gathered in his eyes. He knew they were not only genuine but earnestly faithful, and all he wanted to do was to drop to his knee and propose right then and there - but he knew it wasn’t the right time. “Your birthday is next week,” He pushed the glass, full of wine, towards her. “And I was thinking since it’s on a Sunday, why don’t we take the train into Paris after my last show?” He smiled at her wholeheartedly. “Stay Saturday night, enjoy a relaxing day on Sunday…”

Her eyebrows bobbed up and down on her forehead. “Does this mean that I get you all to myself?”

“Yes it does!”

She chuckled. “Then I’ll take it.”

*****

_Oh, God._

Sloane slowly peeled her eyelids open, letting her pupils adjust to the natural light that shined upon them. She still had no idea where she was, and the mere thought of even just speaking quickly made her head continue to pound.

Richard, lying peacefully next to her, was still asleep. She managed to untangle her arm from underneath him and laid her hand on his chest.

“Richard,” She groaned at the vibration soaring through her body from the single word.

He took in a sharp, deep breath and opened his eyes. “Oh, fuck,”

“What did you do to me last night,” She groaned, closing her eyes tightly. “My entire body hurts.”

He chuckled, and instantly regretted the action. “I believe we consumed three bottles of wine.”

“Oh. God.” She turned over onto her back. “And I’m naked.”

He turned his head and glanced over at her. “Yes. Yes you are.”

She sat up. “I have to pee.” She hung her head in her hands and groaned. “Everything hurts.” She chuckled. “We’re never drinking that much again.”

“No; no, we are not.” He stretched out his arm and brought his hand to her thigh, squeezing it gently. “I’m getting too old for such shenanigans.”

She chuckled. “There is no such thing,” She lifted her head. “Ah, shit. I bet your neighbors are loving this view,” She narrowed her eyes at the open curtains and cursed the bright rays of sunshine continuing to stream in.

“I know I am,” He squeezed her thigh again. “Do you remember what we talked about last night?”

She was quiet for a few seconds. “Shit. Was it important?”

He chuckled. “No, love, don’t worry about it.” He brought his forearm to his head, covering his eyes protectively. “God, that light. Can you please do something about it?”

Sloane stood and closed the curtains, regretting every move she made. Her head pounded, her body ached, her mouth and lips were painfully dry. She made her way to the kitchen and took out a bottled water from the fridge and some Tylenol from the drawer.

“I feel like I’m having a heart attack,”

She chuckled and brought a glass of water and more tylenol to Richard. “You’ll be fine.”

_Men - what wimps they could be…_


	9. Chapter 9

**NINE**   
**[flashback: first interaction]**

Sloane couldn’t help but to roll her eyes at the sight in front of her. ‘Oh for fucks sake,’ She thought absentmindedly, strolling into the exact same bar at the exact same time as a few weeks prior.

There he was. Sitting at the bar, a glass in his hands, sipping it slowly. He had a few tourist brochures in front of him, to which he was carefully flipping through.

Greg, Aberdeen’s finest bartender, was pointing him through a few places. “The winery isn’t too far from here if you’re interested in attending some tastings.” He turned his attention towards the redhead entering the bar and smiled at her. “Hey, Sloane. You just missed your brother.”

Sloane raised her eyebrows and glanced down at her watch. “Getting an early start to the day, hmm?”

“It’s Saturday, people are allowed to have a few drinks before they start their day.” Greg leaned up onto the bar and continued to stare at her. “Can I get something for you?”

She sighed heavily. “I ordered take out.”

“Oh! I’ll go back and find it for you.”

“Find it? I didn’t realize you were so busy today.” She glanced around the empty bar and rested her eyes on the tall, dark, and handsome stranger. She made her way over to him slowly, wondering why this was the third time she had run into him this month.

He took another sip of his drink and glanced over at her, smiling. “Are you going to scold me for getting an early start to the day?”

Sloane raised her eyebrows. “Would you like for me to scold you?”

After a few stunned seconds, he cut his sparkling blue eyes towards her. “I’m always up to try something new.”

She sat on the leather stool beside him and silently shook her head. “I’ll remember that for next time.”

Feeling a bit daring, he leaned over and looked at the sassy redhead sitting next to him. “Is that your natural hair color?”

Sloane turned sharply towards the inquisitive british stranger, who was a little too close for comfort. “Excuse me?”

“Your hair color. Is it natural?” He smiled innocently.

She raised her eyebrows. “Would you like to see for yourself?”

For the second time today, she made him go stupid. He closed his mouth, a smile curling onto his lips and tilted his head towards her. “Don’t tempt me with a good time.”

“It took you quite a while to come up with those seven little words.” She cocked an eyebrow and turned towards him, standing from the barstool she previously resided on.

“You’re something else, you know that?”

She chuckled. “That’s not the first time I’ve heard that.”

“I’m sure your boyfriend tells you all the time.”

“No, I don’t have a…” She trailed off, narrowing her eyes.

That sneaky little Brit…

He grinned. “Oh, is that so? Such a shame.”

She rolled her eyes and took the bag from the bartender. “Thanks Greg. You need to keep an eye on this one over here… he’s known to get a little fresh.”

As she strolled out the door, his conscience got the best of him and he ran out the door towards her, his long legs catching up to her quickly.

“Hey, listen,”

Sloane turned towards him quickly, startling her in the empty street. “Jesus! Do you think sneaking up on people is okay?”

“I’m sorry,” He started, a sly smile staying on his lips. “I didn’t mean to frighten you.”

She couldn’t help but to roll her eyes. “I’m sure. What do you want?”

“To say I’m sorry, actually. I know that I was… fresh, back there, and I really didn’t mean it.”

“Oh, really? That’s a shame,” She stuck out her lower lip, pouting subsequently. “That’s the most action I’ve had in a few months.”

He chuckled, shaking his head slowly. “I find that hard to believe.”

“Well, don’t.” She chuckled. “Is that it, or…?”

He stuck out his hand. “Richard. Richard Armitage.”

She smiled, taking his hand and shaking it softly. “Sloane Weissman.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mentions miscarriage.

**TEN**

Sitting quietly in his dressing room, Richard continued to roll the iphone around in his hands absentmindedly. He rehearsed the words in his head, so eloquently, hoping that the nervousness would subside, but as he found Jon Weismann’s name in his contacts it only seemed to multiply.

He pressed his name quickly, hoping that the faster he could get this over with the faster they could get on with their life. _Their life_. Something that he had always hoped for, since the very first moment that he pressed his lips to hers - an adventurous life full of love specifically from Sloane Weismann.

“Richard!” Jon called out excitedly, a slight laugh rolling from his lips. “Tell me. How has my daughter fared in London?”

“Quite well, actually. She’s made a friend, played nice. I think she is enjoying it immensely.”

“Wonderful, I’m so glad, Richard. She’s truly a free spirit, and I know it’s been so fulfilling to watch her grow in these times.”

Richard smiled. “Absolutely, it is.” He cleared his throat nervously. “I called you because I need some advice,”

Jon couldn’t help but to chuckle. “About my daughter, I presume?”

“Well, yes. As you’re well aware, her birthday is coming up, and I’m thinking of taking her to Paris for the weekend.”

“I’m sure she’ll love it, Richard.”

“Yes, yes, I hope so, it’s just that… After a few conversations we’ve had, I would really like to be able to… Propose to her, and I just wanted to talk it over with you first.”

Jon took a moment to respond, mostly just wanting to make Richard wait a little longer than he expected. He knew that Richard didn’t get nervous about much - unless it revolved around his daughter. “I think it’s a wonderful idea, Richard.” Jon sighed quickly before continuing. “She’s a free spirit, and I love her for that. She needs to get out of this town. She needs to experience life. She… needs to experience _you_.”

“I only want what's best for her.”

“Oh, I know,”

Richard picked up the catch in his future ( _as long as Sloane said yes_ ) father-in-law’s throat and it only produced the same result for him.

They stayed quiet, until Richard’s voice strongly came through the line. “I just want it to be special. She’s… she’s been through so much these past couple of months and I just need her to know how much I care and what I would do for her.” He shook his head slowly and continued. “I want to make the moment special.”

“Think back over your relationship, Richard. It’s never been easy, it’s never been typical, it’s never been normal. But it’s yours, and you two made it exactly how you wanted it. Think back to those first few months where you were feeling out the relationship, and,”

_The umbrella._

“Jon, I hate to interrupt you, but I need you to do me a huge favor…”

*****

The book.

Sloane traced her fingertips against the leather journal, a soft smile forming on her lips. Richard always loved to write - whether it was witty one liners he would email her throughout the day or different ways to say “i love you” on post it notes and hid them around her house… he enjoyed it.

So when he started his book to her, it wasn’t surprising in the least bit - hell, he always knew what she needed. But opening up this newest entry, she was nervous. Their love… although it was always deep and meaningful, she pushed him away after their miscarriage. She hated it, and constantly regretted how she acted and the things she said during those times… and she knew this entry was just going to bring those feelings back up again.

Opening the front cover, she flipped to the latest page and started to read:

_There's one moment during our time in Wilmington that stands out to me the most. Remember that night where we went to the bar, got incredibly wasted, then drunkenly decided to go on the ghost tour? Dear God, it was so fucking hot and you looked so incredible in that tiny dress. We kept hanging back from the group, our hands all over each other. We ended up at your house, having fun, drinking even more - which I didn’t know was even possible. You pushed me into that grey chair in the corner of your living room and I swear to God, I thought that you were going to suck the cushion up through my cock._

...really, Richard?

_I’m also pretty sure that’s the night that we got pregnant._

Shocker: ...it was.

_It’s early in the morning, around 2:30 or so. We’re both passed out on your bed, and something wakes me up - I think it was that incessant beeping on your fridge that would just go off at the most inopportune times. I look over at you, and you’re so incredibly beautiful in that moment. You’re naked, the silk sheet loosely wrapped around your body. I grabbed some water from the bedside table, and you woke up, asking if I was okay. I leaned down, kissed you, and promptly pulled the sheet from you. We were so caught up in the moment of making complete and orgasmic love that we failed to even think about putting on a condom. At that point, all I could focus on was you and how good it felt to be in between your legs._

_Whether it was because we were still too drunk… or just too involved with the rhythmic relations… all I know is that neither one of us wanted to stop. Do you remember that moment, Sloane? The one where you begged me not to stop, so I pinned your arms back and did exactly as you asked?_

Yeah… she remembered.

_Well… I have a confession to make. I knew, that even though you were on birth control, the chance of you still getting pregnant that very morning were pretty high… and I didn’t care. The thought crossed my mind, I imagined you pregnant, being the mother of our child… and I wanted it. At that exact moment in time, I wanted all of you. I didn’t want to stop - I wanted to hear you moaning my name, faster, slower, harder - I wanted to feel your hands pressing against my chest, your fingers running through my hair, your fingernails pulling against my skin._

_That baby would have been born out of complete and total love, and you know that. It was nothing that you did. You heard the doctors - it wasn’t your fault._

Tears continued to fall down her cheeks as she turned the page, both her heart and her stomach wringing in pain and displeasure. She knew it wasn’t her fault. But why her?

_I know that you’re asking yourself “why me”, over and over again in your mind._

_It wasn’t because you told me you didn’t want kids._  
_It wasn’t because you drank wine before you found out._  
_It wasn’t because you hid it from your friends and family._

_It just happened. And no matter how bad we want to take it back… we can’t._

_I keep having this recurring dream. We’re in our bedroom in New York, you’re in the middle of our bed, wearing my old black v-neck shirt with the collar stretched and falling from your shoulder. Your fiery locks are in braids, and in your arms, is a tiny strawberry blond baby girl wrapped in this off white blanket. You can’t take your eyes off her, and I can’t take my eyes off you._

_It was something I didn’t think that I’d ever want - a wife, a baby. But you changed that. You make me want a life, Sloane. And I know that you don’t want to walk red carpets with me or watch me perform from backstage - you want nothing to do with my career, which makes me love you even more._

_You make me want to conquer the world - but only if you’re by my side._

Sloane took a deep breath and found a pen from the table beside her, penning 11 simple words underneath his:

_“You are the best thing that has ever happened to me.”_

*****

Making his way into the master bedroom, Richard collapsed onto the edge of the bed and dropped his head into his open hands. To say that it was a long day would be an understatement. He was exhausted - physically, emotionally, and mentally - and all he wanted to do was crawl into bed and sleep for the next 12 hours.

He took off his shoes, sliding them underneath the front of the bed, and stood slowly, taking off his jacket. He finally stripped down, tossing his clothes into a corner, silently promising to pick them up in the morning... and that’s when he saw it.

_The_ book, _his_ book, _her_ book… sitting on the table beside his side of the bed, calling his name. It was difficult for him to share his mind entirely, even if it was with Sloane. Sometimes, words are hard, and just don’t come easy for him. But words on paper… that’s a completely different story.

He gently lowered himself to the bed with a sigh and took the leather in his hands, flipping through the pages quickly. The last words wrote struck him once again with a force of emotion he didn’t even think that he could muster.

_You are the best thing that has ever happened to me._

Tears flooded his eyes as he closed the book and sat it back down on the table, away from his touch, away from his mind, away from his heart. This woman laying next to him meant everything to him, and for her to open up and reaffirm his feelings… made his proposal that much stronger.

_And he couldn't fucking wait._

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading.


End file.
